Sunburn
by cheeseyfudge
Summary: Dinozzo and Mcgee go undercover to solve a murder at a nudist colony. It's not a slash story, but more like a comedy of errors. Rated for swearing and violence.


Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS, CBS does. All I'm doing is having fun with it. Please don't sue because since I'm not making money off of this, neither are you.

Sunburn

Chapter 1

"Abs, Tell me why I'm doing this again?" Asked Tony DiNozzo as he put on a curly black wig and fishnet gloves.

"Because the Rocky Horror Picture show demands it." Said Abby matter of factley as she put on a pair of long boots.

"That's not what I meant. I mean why am I doing going to it with you?"

"What? You've never done this in college?"

"Hmm, let's see? Beer bonging, keg stands, frat parties, ummm wait wait, attending class. Nope nothing about going to a midnight musical."

"But the Rocky isn't just some musical. It's a Friday night tradition. I haven't had a Friday off in years and I'm going."

"But that still doesn't answer why I'm here."

"Because I told you that I'd show you my tits."

Tony snaps his fingers and claps his hands. "Ding, ding, ding, we have a winner. Tell her what she's won/" he then slips into a announcer type voice. "Welllll Tony she gets an all expense paid night with Tony DiNozzo!!!!"

Abby then claps her hands and squeels. "Yay!"

Just as they were heading to Tony's car, his cell starts to ring. Looking down at the caller id he sees the name, Gibbs. "Damn!" he mutters under breath.

"Yeah DiNozzo"

"DiNozzo get to the bullpen ASAP."

"What's up?"

"Dead Petty Officer. She was found out side of the Paradise Palms nudist resort in Tampa Florida."

Tony looked down at the outfit, then at the phone. "Uh, boss can I go home and change before coming to the office?"

"What part of ASAP did you not get DiNozzo?"

With a sigh "On your six boss." He clicked off his phone and looked to Abby "Ok, Pop them puppies and let's go."

Abby just laughed.

-0-

Thirty minutes later.

The elevator opened and stepped out Abby and Tony. She headed to her lab only to be stopped by Gibbs. "Abby, you better stay during the meeting because you'll be coming with us." Abby did a mock salute and sat on the edge of McGee's desk.

"DiNozzo! Do I even want to know?"

"Rocky Horror Picture Show, boss."

"I saw you as more of the Brad or Riff Raff type." Said Gibbs with an arch of his eyebrow. Abby dissolved into giggles until she felt his gaze, with a small "meep" she stopped.

"Now that everyone is here." He then turned on the plasma monitor. Up came a picture of a woman in her mid 20s with long blonde hair and blue eyes dressed in a Navy dress uniform "What we have is a body of one Petty Officer Jennifer Birk. She was on leave and decided to visit her aunt and uncle in Florida…" He then clicked on the hand held mouse to change the picture on the plasma and came up was a photo of what looked to be a brochure for a nudist colony. "… William and Heather Birk owners of the Paradise Palms nudist resort."

"Boss she was umm 'letting it all hang out'?" asked Tony as he put on a sweat shirt over his corset.

"DiNozzo is this relevant to what I was talking about?"

"No boss." As he felt the swift sting of a head smack.

"Now what we're going to do is this. We're going to Tampa and doing an investigation."

"Shouldn't we let a local branch handle this?"

"No!" Bellowed a man in full uniform denoting his rank as a Major. "My daughter will not be handled by a local branch."

"This is Major Henry Birk." Said Gibbs in a clipped tone to denote that he was annoyed at being interrupted during his briefing.

"I want Gibbs and his team on it because you all tend to find stuff that no one else notices. I know my little girl didn't just off her self. I don't know what type of top secret she was dealing with but I want to find out why she's dead."

"We will." Said Gibbs as everyone else just nodded.

-0-

Tampa Florida.

NCIS office Tampa branch.

"Here's what we have from the preliminary investigation." Said a well tanned man handing a folder to Gibbs.

"We're going to need all the evidence. Abby I know you're not going to like their lab but I need you to do every test known to man."

"Ok Gibbs."

"Abby I'll make up the lack of Caf Pow! Here when we get back."

"Yay! Ultra deluxe super three sips and your dead Caf Pow!"

"Um Boss what are the rest of us going to do?" asked Tim as he fiddled with his tie.

"You and DiNozzo are going to do Undercover at the resort to try to figure out if it was a suicide or a murder."

"Wait! Probie and I are going to stick out like a sore thumb walking around fully clothed."

"You're not going to be clothed."

Tim and Tony both went white as a sheet for a moment.

-0-

Abby fitted both Tony and Tim with a pair of glasses with a pinhole camera in the center of the frame. "Ok guys look up, now down, now left, now right." Said Abby as she checked the monitor to make sure that there was no lag in the single. She then put on a pair of headphones and said. "Tony, say testing."

"Testing." She smiled knowing that the audio built into the bows was working on his. "Now McGee, say testing."

"Uh, testing?"

"Ok audio and video checked. So are you guys nervous about tomorrow?"

"A little, I mean I've never been nude for such a long period of time." Said Tim as he fiddled with his tie.

"Never been through Hell Week huh probie?"

"MIT didn't have frats Tony."

"Your lose. Besides I bet no one will notice that you're naked McTiny."

"I'll have you know that I'm a good size."

"That's very good information McGee." Said Gibbs as he did his 'appear out of nowhere' trick.

"I was uhhh, not that I've measured it. I mean that girls didn't seem to complain. Ok shutting up now."

"Good McGee. Abby are they ready?"

"Yeah Gibbs. So are we recording or just monitoring?"

"We're recording when it's important."

"What's Ziva going to do while we do the undercover work?" Asked Tony as he tried to make Abby dizzy while looking in all directions.

"She's going to run the facial recognition software on anyone you see there."

"Ok boss."

-0-\

The Next Day.

Tim was checking into his room at the resort as Tony was busy watching the women walk around. "Yeah I have a reservation under the name Baggins."

"Like Bilbo?"

"I get that a lot. No it's under Jimmy Baggins."

"Ok sir here's your key."

"Yeah I have a room under the name Jonathan Higgins."

"Like Magnum PI?"

"Yeah, but I'm more handsome." Said Tony as he took the key to his room.

-0-

"Yeah Abs, I'm in the room." Said McGee as he put the room's key on the corner desk. "I'm about to head out and check out the surroundings." He said as he sighed and began to remove his shirt. What he didn't realize was that while he was removing his shirt and pants, Abby had a full view. He heard a small gasp in his earwig as he finally dropped his boxers.

Author's note. Well guys, it's been a while. Tell me what you think of this chapter, and if you like the idea I'll continue. Oh and please tell me if this seems like a episode, because I'm trying to keep everyone in character. Thanks for reading.


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